Lately, I really haven't felt like writing, but today I will write, I don't know why, but I usually write when I'm truly inspired. I know people who write when they're depressed, I mostly write when I'm happy. I love being happy, being depressed and emo makes me feel really glum and blah. That's just not me.

Anyways, I can't wait to start working for Joe's Crab Shack! I'm starting Friday and stuff because it's a new place that's opening here in Orlando somewhere near Disney. Yes, I'm preggorz, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't work. I get bored of doing nothing, that's why I'm in school and stuff.



I can't wait for Joseph Carmine Leo III to come out of me, he's getting on my nerves, I feel kicking and I feel hunger pains all the damn time, the other night I woke up drooling after I dreamed of pizza, bloody hell!

Anyways, as for other things, I don't know really. It's just the same as usual with everything, with my life. I'm so glad I'm not in California anymore. I'm glad to not be surrounded by all that drama, it's so peaceful and quiet here in Orlando, my parents and I are not in contact (Thank god, I hate their asses, they've tortured me enough for 19 years, my dad was sexually abusive and my mom, my dear god.)

I'm in school at the moment getting my Bachelor's, I'm doing it all for two people, my future son and my amazing hubby who I still feel around me, after all, true love doesn't end in death.

I know true love love exists, I just know, to everyone who's been hurt by love and stuff, it'll get better, I do believe there's someone out there for everyone...even if you've been hurt countless of times. There are good men out there, I know it.

Anyways, the name Joe follows me everywhere. I like that, after all, he's my spirit guide.

Lately, I've been seeing lots of spiritual signs and all that, signs of what I want to do and that it'll take some time to accomplish, I can't wait to be famous, to be rich.

Yes, this blog is just lame.

Well....

The Jen is in school working on her Bachelor's.

:)

This shit is pissing me off

"We fit together just like missing puzzle Pieces" -Joe Leo to me.

Okay, today, I was walking around, as usual, just chilling, enjoying the spiritual meanings of life, cause guess what? Life is a spiritual journey, each day, it's different, there are a lot of spiritual clues around, serendipity, everything happening for a reason. It's like some sort of quest each day to find more of yourself.

and guess what I heard a girl talking about? She looked like a teenager, a stupid teenager, to be honest. Why? Cause she was talking about finding her prince charming, that is a pile of bullshit, I overheard her convo and jumped in, I asked her why she was looking for her "Prince Charming" She goes, "Because everyone seems to be finding theirs" Wow, you're kidding me, she needs to be knocked in the head and be sent to woman school, first off, you're not ready to even find your soulmate

Because guess what Soulmates are?

They're people who fit together with you, just like a missing puzzle piece. It pisses me off to no end when I hear people just marrying for money, for fame, for fortune.

Let me ask you this question...for all those people who say they're in love, for those who say they have found "the one"

If your prince charming had a lot of issues, would you still love them? Would YOU? If your prince charming got into jail because of an accident that could've been avoided, would you still love them? Would YOU?

Let me tell you my story.

Joe Leo, he has issues, lots of them, issues just like mine, he's what I call my prince charming, but not in the context of prince charming. He's a man, a real man, but he has faults, he had a lot of wounds to clean up, you think all men are toys to be messed with, right? Wrong. Those girls who fucking use men can kiss my shiny metal ass, not all men want sex, you know?

I don't think you do know. Men want brains. They want a girl who matches their personality, their wit, their humor, just they want someone to LOVE, not just to fuck. If you want a man just to fuck, get a life and a grip on reality, life is NOT a romance novel you sick pieces of shit, you can go and drown in water, deep deep water, and I want you to drown in it because I don't want your ignorant asses living here anymore.

Okay, let's say you found your prince charming....well, lots of issues pop up, would you give him up? Would you? After all, piles of bullshit pop up....we have family issues, money issues, people issues, car issues...etc. Would you walk across hot hot lava? Would YOU ACTUALLY give your life up for the person you loved? Would YOU? Would you DO EVERYTHING? LIke Sacrifice your life FOR THEIRS? Think about it, how many people would actually when it really comes down to that?

...the answer? There goes 3/4 of the people who say they're in love. You say you're in love, okay, nice. Well, let's talk about your soulmate. Do they share your personality? Your faults? Your same issues? Your humor? Your style? Do they fit together with you just like missing puzzle pieces? Do they? Do they make you whole? Do you even understand what I'm talking about? Half of the people won't even understand what I would yaking away about, Oh I laugh at you and your stupidity. Disney? What have you done?

Life isn't a fairy tale.

But I like my castle.

oh and life is not what you think it is, but whatever. Just lay down and play dead, after all, you don't belong here.

I love Joe Leo.

:)

Ignorance is bliss.

People....

Seriously, some people are so ignorant and soooo fucking narrow minded that it pisses me off, some people are fucking dumbasses, I'm serious, even if I don't believe that there's a stupid person out there, apparently there are. Yup, some people don't get metaphorical thinking, I mean, it's not rocket science, or is it?

Right, don't tell me, it is.

WHY SO SERIOUS???????????

I'm quite annoyed, to be honest at those poor little losers.

Right now, I'm pissed at people who don't THINK. Sure, my hormones are all over the place at the moment and I'm eating up everything at the moment, I'm pissed because I hate certain people, people who are ignorant, people who are here for no apparent reason, who don't understand the deeper meaning of life, oh you suck. Period.

That's a no no, my child will know everything about this world and will NOT be ignorant.

Thank god.

I'm just so in love with him, I can't get him out of my head, my thoughts, my mind, every part of me feels like I fall deeper and deeper with him, I don't know how to describe it, love is undescribable, but what I feel for him, my dear god, it's a supermassive black hole, as deep and as vast as the universe and you know how vast the universe is, in every single way, he gives me direction, he makes me feel at home emotionally, and I am so lucky to have him.

I believe in a thing called LOVE.



It feels so weird that someone has such a control on your emotions, on your heart like that, I have to say, it's rather crazy, I feel rather vulnerable most of the time because of the hold he has on my heart, on my soul, on my spirit, on my mind, I can't lose him, life is nothing without him, I'm living for him, he's someone I would die for, someone I would sacrifice everything in a drop of a hat, I have done so, I would not only walk across fire for him, but I would walk across this earth, walk across everything, earth, wind, water, fire, everything life throws at me because I want to be with him, I care so much about his happiness, I care so much about him in general, his happiness is my happiness, his sadness is my sadness, when he shines, I shine. My heart comes out of my chest every time I see his pictures or see him, these feelings of deep deep love jumps out and bites me, I get consumed by these emotions and it feels so good, his voice, his face, his videos, oh dear god, the passion that emits from me, the passion that I feel writing this, the strong feelings, the deepness, he sets my soul alight, there are no words to even begin to describe the little spurts of dizziness I feel, the feelings of completion, the feelings of just everything so good in the universe coming together because of this thing called LOVE. Love is what makes the world go around, it feels so damn good to just linger in his gaze, to see his eyes staring back at me filled with love just as intense as mine, his touch, how I crave for it 24/7, how I hunger for it, how I lust after it like there's no other thing that I would rather feel, just him, only him, he makes me shine like gold, shine like diamonds, shine like the stars, ugh, my heart feels like it's coming out of my chest writing this, by god, he makes me so happy, so happy, soooooo happy, SO HAPPY, IN EVERY SINGLE WAY.

Normally I don't like depending my complete existance, my complete happiness on someone else, but I depend on him, it's just so awkward without feeling him, without feeling the brush on his hand, this love is difficult, so difficult, but in every single way, it's worth it, soulmate relationships aren't meant to be easy, there are so many things trying to tear us apart, daily, him not having a body to manifest in is one, it takes so much out of me trying to stay sane sometimes.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0oYkZs4yR2o

LOve Story-Taylor Swift

I have to say, it's almost the one year anniversary of JoeJen. :O